Why did you decide on the watercolor medium for your illustrations?

 

It’s a very soft, elegant medium. Some of my favorite children’s books were watercolor – they were my inspiration. I wanted the book to be filled with lots of color, and watercolor, with its layers, defines the colors a bit more. I just like the style!

​

What was your process for these illustrations? How long did each one take?

 

My mom had ideas for each illustration. Based on those, I did a storyboard and we went back and forth and discussed each illustration. It took a few hours to sketch each one in pencil first; each painting took about a week.

 

Are any of the details in the paintings especially meaningful?

 

I tried to make each illustration personal. A lot of the details in the first half of the book are things that remind me of my childhood home. We lived in a 1927 red brick house with a green tile roof – that’s in the book. So are my great-grandmother’s framed needlepoint cat, and the deep red wall color of the study. I created my birth mom’s illustrations using photographs from my biological sisters – I tried to recreate the exterior of the house. 

 

When your mom would tell you this story as a young child, what were your thoughts and feelings? How have they changed?

 

I didn’t really understand the concept of adoption as a very young child. But it’s a story of love and I could feel that love – the love both my moms had for me. And I always felt like I was my mom’s star, her special girl. As I got older, I began to understand the very personal aspect of my mom not being able to give birth to a child, and the trauma associated with that. And also the trauma surrounding the difficult choice my birth mom was faced with. I saw the story from their perspective, not just mine.

 

Was it emotional to create these illustrations? What were your feelings as you painted?

 

At the beginning of the story, I could feel how sad my mom was in that quiet house missing the child she couldn’t have. And I could feel my birth mom’s sadness – the trauma of not being able to support another little one. It did make me feel sad – but it was her choice and she did what was best for me. I have no negative emotions toward my birth mom. It’s taken a long time to process, but it’s a happy ending to a happy/sad story.

 

Are the mothers in the paintings symbolic or do they actually look like your birth mom and your adoptive mom?

 

I used pictures as reference for both of them. In the photos I have of my birth mom, she wasn’t wearing traditional Guatemalan clothing, but I wanted that to be representative of her homeland.

 

Has your Guatemalan heritage influenced your art? 

 

Absolutely. My use of color and attention to detail reflect it. I feel like it’s part of my DNA. 

 

What was it like working with your mother on this project?

 

It made it that much more exciting – we’ve been a real team creating this book, and we’ve worked well together. She’s had the story written since I was a baby. That I’m a professional artist and can be a part of it is such a gift. We’ve always had a close bond – it makes complete sense that we’ve done this together as a team. My mom is a writer and a corporate communications consultant - she works with designers and she’s always told me all these stories about her experience working with them. And now I understand – because I’m a graphic designer and illustrator. She has great ideas, but she has some that are hard to swallow at times! But she knows that.

 

Some adoptees struggle with issues of identity. What are your feelings about being adopted? Any struggles?

 

I know some people really struggle with this – they’re sad and emotional. For me, it hasn’t been a big deal. I’ve always been ok with my adoption. Because for me, my parents are my true family. They’ve always been there for me. And that’s good enough for me. There were moments growing up when I wondered, ‘Why didn’t she keep me?’ ‘Did she not love me?’ It was great to find my family and understand my birth mom faced hardships and limited choices.

 

You found your birth family in 2014, only to learn your birth mom had died shortly before that time. Did this change you? How?

 

I was sad I missed the opportunity to meet my birth mom and give her a big hug. And show her I was doing ok. But overall, it hasn’t changed me. It makes me better – I’ve had conversations with my sisters and brother, and that’s been great.