It Don't Matter

It’s been just over a month since our book was released and in that short time, I’ve learned a lot about the world of bookselling. Major takeaway: If you’re not Hoda Kotb or Megan Markle or Jamie Lee Curtis, booksellers – and even libraries -  aren’t interested in having your book on their shelves, hosting events, or even responding to queries. Small publishers and first-time authors (without agents and marketing teams) aren’t viewed kindly. Maybe I don’t know the secret handshake, but I’ve not gotten any traction from local, independent bookstores. I understand the struggle to stay afloat amid the Amazon tsunami, and I respect that. And I’m sure they know way more than I do; the marketing data likely shows that familiar names draw crowds and generate more dollars than small-time authors do. I wanted the book in bookstores because I think parents spend time in their favorite ones with their kids. And I think our book has a meaningful message, not just for families touched by adoption, but for everyone.

I can’t even DONATE our book to the library where I spent hundreds of hours as I child. I simply wanted our book in the place that helped make me (and years later, Marra) a lit lover. But no – committees, rules, blah, blah. I asked if I could simply leave a book there – so I did. It’s there, in someone’s office. Just not on the shelf.

Same response from media – either none, or a polite “no thanks.” The rejection is real.

But enough from Debbie Downer. Because, as my t-shirt from the Alabama restaurant of the same name says, it don’t matter. Here’s what does matter: I’ve been incredibly humbled by the goodness of my village. And it far outweighs the book’s discouraging reception among those who’ve never heard of Marra and me.

So thank you. You bought it, praised it, embraced it. Some high points over the last month:

• Getting a tattoo. Those are words I never thought I’d type.  To celebrate the book’s publication, Marra and I got matching ones.

• Sharing our book with preschoolers at the St. Andrews Presbyterian Church Carnival, held every year for nearby families. St. Andrews in Tucker is my beloved church - Marra went to preschool there and grew up in this supportive, loving community. Such a full circle moment to sign books illustrated by my girl for St. Andrews preschoolers. All thanks to an invitation by sweet Phyllis Bearden, aka Storylady. I’m also so honored that I have a couple more readings in the works – stay tuned for those!

• Visiting the library to drop off our book. Yeah, it’s not going to be on the shelf, but I still got all the feels. Every summer growing up, I would check out so many books. It was a tradition to re-read the same books – my favorite ones, the Betsy-Tacy series, by Maud Hart Lovelace. I now own them all and still re-read them. Here are a few on the library shelf. I love children’s books, and we got one published. A good feeling.

• Finding out Marra’s incredibly kind and thoughtful brother-in-law Elliott, who works in a library in Surrey, England, purchased 10 of our books to donate to nearby libraries. So, hey – they ARE in libraries somewhere in the world!

• Reading your responses to the book. So many kind, generous, meaningful sentiments. I wish I could adequately convey how much reading your words has meant to me.

It’s been an interesting month! I’m still working on a book celebration, so stay tuned. If a bookshop won’t have us, it will be somewhere! And I’m still working on getting the word out about our little book. If you’d like to help, write a review on Goodreads or Amazon, spread the word, send me ideas for how I can spread the word. But just reading this blog is enough. It don’t matter!